Let go and stand up…

As they say, no one wants to be lonely and feel like they are alone, yet as I search for answers and inspirations tonight, I feel that I have been let down. Not even my go-to inspirational blog sites and authors could help me with my dilemma. Not because they are offline, but because their words don’t offer much helf with my state of mind.

Simply because, I know the answer deep down in myself. I know, the fact, that I have been silently bullied and allowed it, every single day of my existence. I also do know that I can’t stand up for myself anymore, because I feel like my voice would just add more chaos than answers. For one, I do shut myself up sometimes simply because I know how it feels to be stabbed by those words. Then again, these people that I’m protecting, doesn’t really realize that their words can be too much on my part sometimes.

It has been my fault to have allowed it, but finding the right balance to correct it, has been a struggle. I realized that silencing myself absolutely doesn’t bring any trouble, but it still doesn’t give me answers. So I’m starting to take the hurt all over again, to correct things that I should’ve done ages ago. I am so over repenting. I will stand up again.

Currently Watching : “Angelito : Ang Batang Ama”

Now that I’m on a week leave, I was able to catch up with ABSCBN’s latest television series specifically “Angelito : Ang Batang Ama”. Previously a fan of JM DeGuzman, Felix Roco and the rest of the gang, I was happy to have been able to catch up with the rest of the episodes. I’m currently on the second week of the show and so far the drama continues to catch my attention.

If there’s one thing that ABSCBN is good at, is the fact that they are able to relay current events to their drama concepts. When trouble ensued with the Armed Forced in the news, lo and behold, the station had a top rating drama in the form of “Minsan Lang Kitang Iibigin”. When the government held debates on sex education, they revamped “Katorse” and released “Angelito : Ang Batang Ama”.

Please, be my baby…

Another shoe post! I don’t know what’s wrong with me lately, but I seem to be attracted to shoes, all of sudden. I don’t know if it’s my need to get one or simply a want, since I don’t buy shoes that often. Nonetheless, I was strolling round the local mall awhile ago to unwind (after finishing my errands), and I found a pair of shoes that is cheap, pretty decent and comfortable.

Imitation suede sandals with a zip at the back. Platform at the front 3 cm, heel 9 cm. Rubber soles. (H&M)

For £19.99. It’s really not bad. Plus, I can wear this when we go home to the Philippines, for those December family parties and night outs. See you on next week’s payday!

Gaga over “Ultragirl Putty” by Jason Wu + Melissa

I rarely go gaga for fashion, but I have to admit, I am starting to feel that I need to inject some of it into my life. I may not be the type who knows every collection this designer have or memorize the amount of trends going on this season, however, this basic nutcase admits that some slight changes in my wardrobe and maybe lifestyle might do the trick.

Jason Wu + Melissa Shoes Ultragirl Putty

Long story short, I found the new pair of flats that I want to splurge on come Spring 2012. It’s Jason Wu’s collaboration with shoe brand Melissa. & the moment I saw the photo while reading a magazine awhile ago, I thought that I should have it, by hook or by crook. The flats roughly costs £85-90 and for a high end label, I say the cost is not that bad. My feet can’t wait to have you!

I’ve gained weight & I know it

I know I barely update this blog anymore, as much as I really wanna shares some of the interesting that is happening around me. & I know you get this message everytime I make a blog post consistently for the past few months now, but I will try. Not because I want to please or keep anyone stalking through my daily life, but also because I wanted to keep track of my thoughts online.

I may have Twitter, Facebook and all other social networking accounts, but to my very personal and corny college days, I had Multiply. And up until now, I couldn’t dare leave that website because it keeps memory of my previous posts, the updates, college frustrations, outcries and interesting relationships. So I guess I have to elbow myself to start documenting the new chapter of my life, here, in WordPress, again. A promise I have broken and rewritten for the past few months.

So here goes, cheers. x

PS. This is a vanity photo my sister encouraged me to pose for. It was on an empty parking lot, after we’ve attended a family friend’s birthday party. Not really my style, but I like it in a way.
Jacket – Forever21;Dress – H&M; Shoes – New Look 

FVCKING AMAZING

EVERYTHING FROM THE PAST FEW DAYS HAVE BEEN FVCKING AMAZING. To those who follow me on Twitter, I’m pretty sure I already spammed your timeline with my Big Bang updates, especially after they have surprised us with their arrival and MTV EMA win. Let me just say that it has been a crazy ride for me, even crazier for some.

Photo from BigbangUpdates

My mentions were trolling, bloghits for this blog and OhKpop were skyrocketing and I found myself spazzing to every update about them. All because of one Korean boyband. The only Korean boyband that I followed with much loyalty and love. I may not have been the type to purchase all of their merchandises, nor spam various fansites and forums, but everything that has happened for the past few days was just beyond amazing. So amazing I might go crazy.

Although I am sad to see them leave, after having an emotional weekend with them, I am more than happy that my babies started on a clean and banging start. As a fan, nothing and no one can take this moment away from us and I am happy to have been a part of it, no matter how small of a voice I can be.

{03 NOV/2011} The day I met BIGBANG~

Ever since meeting Rain last January, everything about London and Korean Pop seem to match. So imagine to my surprise when I receive a text saying to head to Heathrow Airport 4PM, because BIG BANG is fvcking coming.

One, I wasn’t in the right mind to realize that they left South Korea (i.e. airport photos) because I barely woke up. Two, I didn’t even know if it was legit. Trusting a good friend via Twitter, my sister and I decided to risk it. And by four in the afternoon, we met up with some UK VIP friends and waited for Big Bang. And boy was it worth the risk~